The Lord has been doing wonderful things in and through me. Wow! I'm finally at the point where I'm okay with being back in New York. I haven't thought about school in almost 2 weeks. Sometimes, you just gotta let go, and let God.
On Nov 18th, I return to the doctor. I will be able to discuss a return date then! :)
I've been thinking a lot about a few things. The Lord has been taking me through some stuff. My pastor was talking about how it's in our suffering that God works to conform us more to the image of His Son, Jesus Christ. I pray that my life would not only be a sacrificial offering unto the Lord, but that when people meet me, they would see Jesus, and not me. I have a long way to go. I need Him to do a might work!
I've also been thinking a lot about Psalm 138:2: "You have exalted your Word above all your name." I don't know what this really means and why, but God honors his Word (Scripture) even more than His name. That blows my mind away!! That tells me that we (well, I) need to be in the Word even more. If God thinks that His Word is higher than His name, how should we view it?
Sunday, November 14, 2010
The Hospital Post
I’m writing this on the last full day at the hospital in Suriname. I’m going to give you a recap about the first few days. I stopped taking notes after that because I just got so frustrated with the fact that I had to stay a total of 10 days when I was told 2 days. Plus, daily life in the Suriname hospital is so redundant. I’m just writing about the interesting things.
I would like to thank all those from my school, church, and community who came to visit me in the hospital. Your presence was the highlight of all my days!! For those who could not make it, but were praying or thinking about me, thank you. I know that the Lord hears the prayers of the saints. He has heard, and He has done great things!
Disclaimer: In no way does this post reflect my feelings about Suriname. I love Suriname. Please take this blog with a bit of humor. One must find humor in the situation. I attempted to include the drama that was playing out in my head. (Example: I would never scream "aahh!" at being woken up at 4:30 am...I'm just thinking it). I am forever grateful to the doctors who diagnosed me immediately and treated it aggressively. In the States, I would not have received the same treatment. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you, God for having me in Suriname at this time!
Day 1
I was at the hospital visiting the eye doctor and neurologist from 0630 to 1400. I was given the news: Pseudo-tumor cerebi. Can you just imagine hearing only the word “tumor?” Yeah, that was me! I have a what? And it’s fake? Huh? After careful examinations and explanations I understood. I understood that I had to go into the hospital for 2 days to have a lumbar puncture to measure the welling inside the cranium. How does this happen? No one knows. After the neurologist makes some phone calls, I’m told to report at 5 to check-in.
So, nothing went right. Well, let me rephrase that. Nothing went according to how it was explained to me. Check-in at 5? Yeah, try 8 pm. Three hours of sitting there. No one helped us to the fourth floor. I looked fine, but didn’t feel well. Apparently, looking fine gets you different treatment. Finally, made it to the right floor with the aid of ICU nurses. Checked in for the floor. Dropped off at a room with a bed. Is this my room? Am I supposed to wait? What do I do? I guess this is my room! YAY! It’s private. Ah, the joys of being the “American Princess.” Wait, they must think I have money…haha
So, I’m sitting there with no ID on my wrist, bed, or door. Karen, under the direct instruction of my mom, writes my name in pen on my wrist and on a piece of paper. She tacks the paper to the door with a band-aid.
Later on, this funny guy comes in. He calls himself “Easy” in Dutch. I’m not sure what to make of this. He told me he felt the Holy Spirit in the room. He wanted me to sing and play hymns on piano (he saw my hymn book). He was funny. Little English. Missing Front Teeth. Fun.
Was told the Spinal Tap would be tonight, but it’s well after 9 pm. Met the resident neurologist and freaked him about how I was told him it was going to be today. That didn’t work.
If you are in the hospital in Suriname, you must bring everything with you, including your own toilet paper!
(View from the hospital room)
Day 2 – Spinal Tap Morning
0430…”Goedemogren! Can you wash your body?” I rub my eyes very hard and look around. It’s 4:30 am!!! What has possessed you to wake me up at 4:30 am?!? I suck it up and obey. I’m not sure if this is an offer, request, or an order. I take a shower and go back to bed. 0630 another lady comes to my room with tea. This is nice, but it’s still 0630!!! I don’t know about all this. Waited impatiently for the results of my blood test. I couldn’t have the tap without a blood test. The doctor convinced the nurse to draw the blood last night and put a rush on it. As I wait, who should walk in? My friend, Donovan! Donovan is from my church. He is an intern at this hospital, and he just got transferred to this floor two days prior. He always makes me smile. Maybe this won’t be so bad.
After Donovan left, I met another nurse, who is a Christian. I translated some paper from a medicine package for her from Italian to English…If felt good to be helpful, and it felt even better to actually remember all those Italian words!
Time for Spinal Tap – SCARED!!! Doctor freaked me out. Talking about paralysis, etc. Why is he telling me this? I have to lay on my side in the fetal position. I’m so scared that I can barely get myself in a good position. A nurse comes to squeeze my body together. It hurts more. It’s mostly from the pressure in my head. I pray to God that my friend would show up. Within a few minutes he does, and he tells the nurse he’ll take over. He’s more gently, patting my head and holding my hand. I’m probably breaking his. As soon as the doctor says there is no anesthetic, I start crying. Why not? The logic is that I will then get two shots and will feel one. Yeah, but the first won’t go in as far!
The Spinal Tap – extremely painful. Cried throughout the entire procedure. Had to stay still for 10 minutes like that with the needle in my back. It felt like forever. Doctor tried to talk to me to calm me down, but it didn’t work. At least I was still. Just crying a lot. The interns were all impressed. Ha ha.
I had to lie still for 2 hours without moving a muscle after the procedure. This is because the fluid has to be redistributed. If you move, you can end up with a headache that is worse than what you came in with. After 2 hours, an intern comes in and does a physical. I can get up. He tells me how he admires me for my bravery. He has seen grown men scream, holler, and move around and it’s difficult to do the spinal tap. He finally asked me if it hurt. Can you imagine what I was thinking when he asked that???
After all the tests, we got into a very special conversation. I had the privilege to share the Gospel of Jesus Christ with this man. He has lived in Suriname his whole life, but has never heard it. He is not sure if he believes that any god exists. He relies on science. However, he said he would consider our conversation. Please pray for him.
Friends from school came today. Happy, but I feel sad that I can’t go home. Brought me some Readers’ Digest! Woohoo. Read them all 3 times through. I don’t like it here much. Why can’t I just take my medicine at home?
Have I told you about the food? Breakfast: 4 slices of bread and butter and tea…some cheese or bologna. Lunch: Rice, a small piece of meat and a vegetable. Dinner: 4 slices of bread and butter and cheese or bologna, if I’m lucky, an egg.
How to jump-start a low-carb diet:
1. Get youself admitted to a hospital for approximately one week. 10 days is better, preferably in Suriname.
2. Make sure the hospital staff feeds you at least twice a day: 4 slices of bread at a time.
3. Eat it all! Remember, you’re in the hospital for a reason….and “you need your strength,” as mother would say.
4. Either escape from the hospital (see escape plan) or get discharged.
5. Resume life.
6. When you come into contact with bread or bread products, you will instantly run away from them quickly!!! Thus, beginning your low-carb diet!!
(Post-Spinal Tap....WOW!!)
Day 3
Three hours of sleep. 0425 “Can you wash your body?” AAAHHHH!!! I want to sleep. I don’t care if I smell. I’m down with that. She tells me to shower. I walk in and there are two naked men!!! They didn’t close the doors! I turn with such embarrassment! They two men think it’s funny. I don’t.
Not feeling so great today. The fluid in my brain is redistributing. Small headache. Not getting all my medicine. Donovan said they might do a second spinal tap. Max and Linda came to visit! YAY! People! Doctor came and said I have to stay another day for more tests. Tomorrow I’ll find out if I can go home. Don’t know if surgery is needed.
Read 300 pages of a book today. My friends and board members came to visit and pray with me. Felt so encouraged! I love working with a Christian organization. If this had happened at one of my old jobs the thing people would have cared about is “are you able to work.”
In the end, God is in control. His will be done…
Made friends with a Muslim police officer tonight. He kept asking me to marry him (I had a total of 3 proposals). You step to me and you don’t love God with all your heart, soul, and mind, then I hope you’re prepared to meet the Lord, Jesus Christ! Again, God granted me the privilege to share the beautiful, glorious Gospel of the Lord, Jesus Christ!! For 3 hours, I spoke with this officer about our sin problem, our debt to God, and how God has shown us grace, mercy, and love through His remedy: the cross of Christ.
I liked this guy (not in the way that you might think, so stop). He actually listened. I was just pouring through Scripture with him. He thought I was a pastor. I told him I was not. I’m not anything. I’m someone who has been forgiven by the grace of God, when I did not deserve it. He brought up some different issues, and I told him that I would NOT kill for the Word of God, but I would willingly die for the Word of God. He was so taken by that. He could not understand why.
If God has caused me to have this condition, just in order to bring the Gospel to these people, then thank you, Lord, for my affliction. May the truth of who you are be known to these people and my they run and fall at your feet in worship.
Days 4-8
Same old stuff. No one wakes me up at 0430. Woohoo! Been sleeping until about 7.
My “roommate” is very needy. She wanted me to feed her through her tube. I tried to explain to her that I am not qualified or comfortable to do so. She keeps telling her visitors that no one feeds her. It’s not true.
Got a new doctor. He’s about my age. He’s Chinese-Surinamese, but he speaks Haaka, not Mandarin. I still talk to him in Mandarin. It’s fun. I think he understands.
Very antsy to get out of here. More church friends came! YAY! I tried to escape from the hospital, but my plan was foiled! Boo to that nurse.
I missed Canadian Thanksgiving, but my friends were faithful to feed me REAL food!!!! I ate EVERYTHING they sent, except for the bread...sorry! :)
It has been decided that I will return to New York City for follow-ups. Hmmm…yay?
Day 9
2nd Spinal Tap. No anesthetic, but this time, I don’t cry!!! It did not hurt as much! Opening Pressure was 16 cm!! Woohoo!! Medicine working!! LOVE IT!
Leaving tomorrow. Can’t wait. Do not like hospital, but LOVE the opportunities that God has given me. Thank you.
Day 10
Release day!!! YAY!! Wait, what? You won’t let me go? You want $8,000 USD?!?! My insurance said they were taking care of it! The paper is missing and your office is closing…NO! Get me out!!
Thanks to mom, who came to Suriname to get me, she took care of the insurance issue. God bless the insurance company for working everything out. Thank you, God , for being my strong tower, my refuge, my provider, my deliverer from all fears. You are God; there is no one like You!
Making my way to New York City tonight.
Love!
I would like to thank all those from my school, church, and community who came to visit me in the hospital. Your presence was the highlight of all my days!! For those who could not make it, but were praying or thinking about me, thank you. I know that the Lord hears the prayers of the saints. He has heard, and He has done great things!
Disclaimer: In no way does this post reflect my feelings about Suriname. I love Suriname. Please take this blog with a bit of humor. One must find humor in the situation. I attempted to include the drama that was playing out in my head. (Example: I would never scream "aahh!" at being woken up at 4:30 am...I'm just thinking it). I am forever grateful to the doctors who diagnosed me immediately and treated it aggressively. In the States, I would not have received the same treatment. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you, God for having me in Suriname at this time!
Day 1
I was at the hospital visiting the eye doctor and neurologist from 0630 to 1400. I was given the news: Pseudo-tumor cerebi. Can you just imagine hearing only the word “tumor?” Yeah, that was me! I have a what? And it’s fake? Huh? After careful examinations and explanations I understood. I understood that I had to go into the hospital for 2 days to have a lumbar puncture to measure the welling inside the cranium. How does this happen? No one knows. After the neurologist makes some phone calls, I’m told to report at 5 to check-in.
So, nothing went right. Well, let me rephrase that. Nothing went according to how it was explained to me. Check-in at 5? Yeah, try 8 pm. Three hours of sitting there. No one helped us to the fourth floor. I looked fine, but didn’t feel well. Apparently, looking fine gets you different treatment. Finally, made it to the right floor with the aid of ICU nurses. Checked in for the floor. Dropped off at a room with a bed. Is this my room? Am I supposed to wait? What do I do? I guess this is my room! YAY! It’s private. Ah, the joys of being the “American Princess.” Wait, they must think I have money…haha
So, I’m sitting there with no ID on my wrist, bed, or door. Karen, under the direct instruction of my mom, writes my name in pen on my wrist and on a piece of paper. She tacks the paper to the door with a band-aid.
Later on, this funny guy comes in. He calls himself “Easy” in Dutch. I’m not sure what to make of this. He told me he felt the Holy Spirit in the room. He wanted me to sing and play hymns on piano (he saw my hymn book). He was funny. Little English. Missing Front Teeth. Fun.
Was told the Spinal Tap would be tonight, but it’s well after 9 pm. Met the resident neurologist and freaked him about how I was told him it was going to be today. That didn’t work.
If you are in the hospital in Suriname, you must bring everything with you, including your own toilet paper!
(View from the hospital room)Day 2 – Spinal Tap Morning
0430…”Goedemogren! Can you wash your body?” I rub my eyes very hard and look around. It’s 4:30 am!!! What has possessed you to wake me up at 4:30 am?!? I suck it up and obey. I’m not sure if this is an offer, request, or an order. I take a shower and go back to bed. 0630 another lady comes to my room with tea. This is nice, but it’s still 0630!!! I don’t know about all this. Waited impatiently for the results of my blood test. I couldn’t have the tap without a blood test. The doctor convinced the nurse to draw the blood last night and put a rush on it. As I wait, who should walk in? My friend, Donovan! Donovan is from my church. He is an intern at this hospital, and he just got transferred to this floor two days prior. He always makes me smile. Maybe this won’t be so bad.
After Donovan left, I met another nurse, who is a Christian. I translated some paper from a medicine package for her from Italian to English…If felt good to be helpful, and it felt even better to actually remember all those Italian words!
Time for Spinal Tap – SCARED!!! Doctor freaked me out. Talking about paralysis, etc. Why is he telling me this? I have to lay on my side in the fetal position. I’m so scared that I can barely get myself in a good position. A nurse comes to squeeze my body together. It hurts more. It’s mostly from the pressure in my head. I pray to God that my friend would show up. Within a few minutes he does, and he tells the nurse he’ll take over. He’s more gently, patting my head and holding my hand. I’m probably breaking his. As soon as the doctor says there is no anesthetic, I start crying. Why not? The logic is that I will then get two shots and will feel one. Yeah, but the first won’t go in as far!
The Spinal Tap – extremely painful. Cried throughout the entire procedure. Had to stay still for 10 minutes like that with the needle in my back. It felt like forever. Doctor tried to talk to me to calm me down, but it didn’t work. At least I was still. Just crying a lot. The interns were all impressed. Ha ha.
I had to lie still for 2 hours without moving a muscle after the procedure. This is because the fluid has to be redistributed. If you move, you can end up with a headache that is worse than what you came in with. After 2 hours, an intern comes in and does a physical. I can get up. He tells me how he admires me for my bravery. He has seen grown men scream, holler, and move around and it’s difficult to do the spinal tap. He finally asked me if it hurt. Can you imagine what I was thinking when he asked that???
After all the tests, we got into a very special conversation. I had the privilege to share the Gospel of Jesus Christ with this man. He has lived in Suriname his whole life, but has never heard it. He is not sure if he believes that any god exists. He relies on science. However, he said he would consider our conversation. Please pray for him.
Friends from school came today. Happy, but I feel sad that I can’t go home. Brought me some Readers’ Digest! Woohoo. Read them all 3 times through. I don’t like it here much. Why can’t I just take my medicine at home?
Have I told you about the food? Breakfast: 4 slices of bread and butter and tea…some cheese or bologna. Lunch: Rice, a small piece of meat and a vegetable. Dinner: 4 slices of bread and butter and cheese or bologna, if I’m lucky, an egg.
How to jump-start a low-carb diet:
1. Get youself admitted to a hospital for approximately one week. 10 days is better, preferably in Suriname.
2. Make sure the hospital staff feeds you at least twice a day: 4 slices of bread at a time.
3. Eat it all! Remember, you’re in the hospital for a reason….and “you need your strength,” as mother would say.
4. Either escape from the hospital (see escape plan) or get discharged.
5. Resume life.
6. When you come into contact with bread or bread products, you will instantly run away from them quickly!!! Thus, beginning your low-carb diet!!
(Post-Spinal Tap....WOW!!)Day 3
Three hours of sleep. 0425 “Can you wash your body?” AAAHHHH!!! I want to sleep. I don’t care if I smell. I’m down with that. She tells me to shower. I walk in and there are two naked men!!! They didn’t close the doors! I turn with such embarrassment! They two men think it’s funny. I don’t.
Not feeling so great today. The fluid in my brain is redistributing. Small headache. Not getting all my medicine. Donovan said they might do a second spinal tap. Max and Linda came to visit! YAY! People! Doctor came and said I have to stay another day for more tests. Tomorrow I’ll find out if I can go home. Don’t know if surgery is needed.
Read 300 pages of a book today. My friends and board members came to visit and pray with me. Felt so encouraged! I love working with a Christian organization. If this had happened at one of my old jobs the thing people would have cared about is “are you able to work.”
In the end, God is in control. His will be done…
Made friends with a Muslim police officer tonight. He kept asking me to marry him (I had a total of 3 proposals). You step to me and you don’t love God with all your heart, soul, and mind, then I hope you’re prepared to meet the Lord, Jesus Christ! Again, God granted me the privilege to share the beautiful, glorious Gospel of the Lord, Jesus Christ!! For 3 hours, I spoke with this officer about our sin problem, our debt to God, and how God has shown us grace, mercy, and love through His remedy: the cross of Christ.
I liked this guy (not in the way that you might think, so stop). He actually listened. I was just pouring through Scripture with him. He thought I was a pastor. I told him I was not. I’m not anything. I’m someone who has been forgiven by the grace of God, when I did not deserve it. He brought up some different issues, and I told him that I would NOT kill for the Word of God, but I would willingly die for the Word of God. He was so taken by that. He could not understand why.
If God has caused me to have this condition, just in order to bring the Gospel to these people, then thank you, Lord, for my affliction. May the truth of who you are be known to these people and my they run and fall at your feet in worship.
Days 4-8
Same old stuff. No one wakes me up at 0430. Woohoo! Been sleeping until about 7.
My “roommate” is very needy. She wanted me to feed her through her tube. I tried to explain to her that I am not qualified or comfortable to do so. She keeps telling her visitors that no one feeds her. It’s not true.
Got a new doctor. He’s about my age. He’s Chinese-Surinamese, but he speaks Haaka, not Mandarin. I still talk to him in Mandarin. It’s fun. I think he understands.
Very antsy to get out of here. More church friends came! YAY! I tried to escape from the hospital, but my plan was foiled! Boo to that nurse.
I missed Canadian Thanksgiving, but my friends were faithful to feed me REAL food!!!! I ate EVERYTHING they sent, except for the bread...sorry! :)
It has been decided that I will return to New York City for follow-ups. Hmmm…yay?
Day 9
2nd Spinal Tap. No anesthetic, but this time, I don’t cry!!! It did not hurt as much! Opening Pressure was 16 cm!! Woohoo!! Medicine working!! LOVE IT!
Leaving tomorrow. Can’t wait. Do not like hospital, but LOVE the opportunities that God has given me. Thank you.
Day 10
Release day!!! YAY!! Wait, what? You won’t let me go? You want $8,000 USD?!?! My insurance said they were taking care of it! The paper is missing and your office is closing…NO! Get me out!!
Thanks to mom, who came to Suriname to get me, she took care of the insurance issue. God bless the insurance company for working everything out. Thank you, God , for being my strong tower, my refuge, my provider, my deliverer from all fears. You are God; there is no one like You!
Making my way to New York City tonight.
Love!
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